As I Step Into 2022

I hate to admit it but most of my heels and boots are from either Zara or ASOS (RAID). What are your favorite places to go shoe shopping?

    Considering the events of the first year of the pandemic, I think many of us tried to step into 2021 as hopeful as we were capable of doing. Heck, I even started a YouTube channel to kick the year off on a strong note. 

Oh, naïvité. 

    

    I thought I'd have all the opportunities to travel safely again and be around good people I hadn't seen in a while. Yet, here we are. Who would've thought that continuing to politicize science and healthcare would prolong a pandemic? I mean... who knew? Wild.

-

"I'm excited to continue experiencing the fullness of my humanity and looking forward to embracing that dynamic- my dynamic."

-

    I tried to find peace through precious solitude when I could. With every decision I had to make, I tried to hold onto that peace. I even worked out consecutively for a few months after a depressive phase until I fell off... again. 

    While the world dealt with heaviness, I tried focusing on building my photography and applying what I could as I pivoted my attention to cinematography. I think diving deeper into filmmaking has been a great way of coping (tell me you're a filmmaker on a budget without telling me you're a filmmaker on a budget). 

    I've retained more knowledge from this past year alone than I ever have during the four years I spent milking what seemed like the last of my brain cells at university. Learning new things after graduating feels different. It feels less... demoralizing. Yes? I think that's the word.

Earings from Amazon. Makeup by me. Would you like to see a how-to on my YouTube?

    I started writing down affirming notes and faith-filled reminders to myself on pieces of paper. I placed them at eye level at the corner of my little "office". They say that I am easy to love and that I have a beautiful mind. Because I am and I do; still, I struggle. They remind me that I am not my depression nor is my worth measured by the life circumstances pride or society tell me I should be ashamed of. They remind me that the woman behind the sparkles is who's most important.

I keep saying that I won't model anymore but here we are.
Sup.

    In the past, my introverted tendencies felt like a weakness. I realize now that it's quite the opposite but the insecurities that spawned from that mentality hung over me like crimson flashing. It attracted... not the very best of relationships. I fell into a cycle of accepting toxic and inconsiderate people into my private life. It took a pandemic for me to stop and realize that.

    In 2021, I saw who cared for me as a person. I recognized those who genuinely supported me. You can really feel it, y'know- when someone supports you and when they expect nothing in return. You can feel their interest. You can be joyful together. I'd like to find more of that.

Green velvet dress from Zara many winters ago, size: x-small.

    Selectiveness was something I really took note of nearing the end of 2020. Even though doors may open, it doesn't always mean one has to venture through. As time goes on, aspirations change because of new experiences and goals become more refined. I think I did a fair job keeping true to my intuition. Being selective in what I participated in and how I did that really helped the initial tendency to run around doing tasks aimlessly (for the simple fact that sometimes having no goal at all is honestly really entertaining for me).

I'm just really proud of how I edited this shot I took.
Also, I very much recommend trying Terra, if you're into beer.
Bag from Mango.

    I'm excited to continue experiencing the fullness of my humanity and looking forward to embracing that dynamic- my dynamic. My heart is open, I am its protector, and I'm eager to begin new adventures. Life is fleeting after all.

    Anyways, I think I'm going to make myself another cup of coffee... Talk with you soon.

xoxo

Happy New Year from my little family to yours!

Marr Aragon, Creative Director, Editor & Photographer

Credit to D. Park, Assistant Creative Director

-

My name is Marr Aragon. I'm a Filipino American actor, creative director, photographer, and aspiring filmmaker in Dallas, Texas.

[ more marr ]